A Review: Tekken

When I was ten years old, Tekken 3 was released onto the original Playstation gaming system in 1998. I fell in love right there and paired with Gan Turismo I had no other reason to live than to play those games. I've been a Tekken series fan ever since.

So it goes without saying that when I found out about this getting made I was excited to say the least. Then I asked myself not as a game enthusiast, but as a student of film, "Why isn't this making it's way around the headlines of the usual trades online with film news?"

It hit me when I found out about the director, the producer, writer, and then actor's. Fuck, this is a low-budget B movie. Great.

But wait! There's more!

Catwoman Robberies in NYC? Hit The Batsignal Gordon!

When you walk into a high-end shoe store in Manhattan, spend a half an hour poking around, all WHILE WEARING A CAT MASK--you deserve the money if someone doesn't put together how sketchy that is.

This is the (most awesome and appreciated) sketch by a police artist of the woman. She eventually approached the counter after a thirty minutes of practically loitering and presented a note claiming she had a gun, and asked for the money. She grabbed $86 bucks in cash, stuffed it in her purse, and calmly exited the store.

Dude...

The next day, she pulled another daring heist at a beauty shop. She got $500 bones all to herself.  

The police have zero leads.

She's allegedly been linked to 2 other robberies in Queens, and a 9 West shoe store from last year.

Honestly, this is the kinda stuff that get's geeks involved with their cosplay costumes, and before you know it, you have two ordinary citizens running around, causing mischief, making people laugh, and being intention badasses, by accident. Sorta. Ya know? Lol. I'd love to see some real life Kick Ass.



Good looks to CBS News on this.

Munki out.

A Review: Killers

Considering this director, I'm not really surprised by what I just saw. Robert Luketic is the directorial equivalent to drinking a glass of water spiked with Visine. 

When you hear that Ashton Kutcher is staring in a film, where he plays a unnamed agency, uh... agent, who marries Heigl, who doesn't know he is one, and then goes on some sloppy adventure with him, becoming his suedo-side-kick in the process... What do you think? Good action-comedy, bad action-comedy? Shit? Terrific? Drivel? Yes ma'am? 

I'm not here to say, but I do get paid (wishful thinking) to state my own opinion of what I think and feel after viewing a film, or movie. In this case, I do not believe I saw either, but a disaster akin to a motorcycle smashing into a car, or even, that kid who got blasted in the face by the unknowing break dancer. Yeah... That's how I feel. This film is like a swift kick to the chin. Only the kick keeps kicking you again and again, for 100 fucking minutes. 

And then it's over. 

But wait! There's more!

A Review: The Twilight Saga: New Moon (Yeah... That's Right)

Oh, my, oh, my... The Twilight Saga. What a tangled web we weave Stephenie. Yeah, whatev. The DVD is out, I saw the first one in theaters last November and now this one is floppin' around. I am an amateur film analyst right? Plus, these movies, like or not, are a big part of the American Zeitgeist right now. I owe it to myself to review things, all things, when I find the time. As long as it's on film (even though I have a feeling they skipped on 35mm film stock and used bubblegum straight outa the pockets of 12 year girls) it's open to be reviewed. 

So let's get started shall we?