Wednesday, September 15, 2010

'The Tourist' Trailer Drops!!!

And so did poop into ma drawers, but it's okay because why. . . ? Diapers!!! (If you read this blog you'll get it)

Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie have come together to make a shit ton of cash.

I mean, charge the audience's sex-drive through the roof.

I mean, create a huge splash at the box office and cash in on their huge sex-appeal ontop of the fact that they never have stared together in a blockbuster before.
I mean, to rip off a great French film in a true American cinema fashion.

I mean, to create like true artists? Yeah, that one.

The Tourist is directed by Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck (The Lives Of Others). That dude's film won Best Foreign at the Oscar's and Best Director and Script for himself at the German Oscar's that year. He's an alright dude and The Lives Of Others is a fascinating view into, well, the lives of others, during 80's Germany involving East Berlin. Watch it.

Anyway, a quick run-down of what it sometimes takes to get a script produced for those of you who don't know. Hint: the bigger the stars, the bigger the project, the better the director--the harder shit get's everyday. So first this is a Tom Cruise project with Bharat Nalluri set to direct. (Though I don't know why with his resume'--maybe he pitched a good angle to the studio) Then Cruise stupidly left (most likely cuz he didn't have as much control as he wanted to) and stared in the box office and critical disaster movie Knight & Day. I'm sure he sincerely regrets it. I said him and Diaz redeemed it, but that doesn't make it a tolerable movie to watch. Anyway, and Charlize Theron was still there to be the female lead. Then, Spyglass brings in Sam Worthington and then Theron bails the fuck out. She obviously didn't think he was worth acting with. I agree very much. Then they bring in Jolie, and for whatever reason Bharat Nalluri left as well, probably his only chance to ever work with her. Sam Worthington thought that was a good idea to do that too, he bailed. Then Spyglass Entertainment brings in Depp, and Alfonso Cuaron (Children Of Men, Gravity) as director. But Cuaron was a rumor and Florian was in the chair after Nalluri got wise and left (Idiot!). Jolie's agreement to do the film was oin the condition she find he right director. My kinda deal. Nice. Florian didn't exactly agree and bounced, then came back, and then they filmed it.

Wooooo! Take a breath! Man, takes a lot outa ya just to process that shit. Doesn't that suck? Trying to make a film is so shitty sometimes in Hollywood.

The French original, Anthony Zimmer is so awesome is different ways. It plays things straight, crime, thriller cat/mouse stuff only. There's no Depp to make it lightly funny in only a way he can do that.

This is coming at you in December to make the most money next to Little Fockers, Tron: Legacy and maybe Chronicles of Narnia. I doubt the indie flicks I'm excited about are gonna make huge commercial splashes but here's hoping people treat themselves to real film-making. 

Munki excitedly out.

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